Weary

I'm feeling weary, just tired to the bones. I'm not entirely sure why. Recently a woman at our new church lost her baby at 7 months. This brought me back to thinking about Faith. I am feeling frustrated and defeated. I feel useless. Since I don't know this woman, I can't do anything for her besides pray and tell her friends that I know, yes it's awful, it will get easier, but it will always be a part of their lives now. I just feel like God hasn't used me or my loss in a tangible way--I can't minister to this woman or her family. When will my experience make a difference? God brings this woman just so close--but not close enough for me to be of any use.
Then this got me to thinking about spiritual gifts. I'm pretty sure that I'm supposed to have one, but I don't have a clue what it is. I've taken the inventory tests and they're fairly inconclusive--not pointing to anything specific. I feel so inadequate--and the one experience in my life that sets me apart from so many others has yet to be one that I can use to help someone else. I just want to leave some kind of a legacy--make a difference--serve the Kingdom of God. And this desire has left me weary. As the words from one of the songs on my blog says, "Lord, I'm tired, so tired from walking." and I hear the Lord say back to me, "Jaime, press on towards the goal for the prize for which God has called you heavenward in Christ Jesus." So, I will do that.